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Mike Ristich
-Owner, GM,Player, Assistant Coach
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Known
for his ferocity on and off the
pitch, this surly defender has a
long history of near-hooliganism.
Past teams have noted his willingness
in physically accosting teammates
if, and when, they do not meet his
extraordinary expectations. Seeking
to reinvigorate his own playing
career and "give it one last
shot," he has assembled a rag-tag
bunch of misfits in quest for domination
and glory.
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David Ristich
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As
the starting goaltender for OYFC,
David is a viable candidate for
the
prestigious "Golden Gloves"
award. Known for his ability in
stopping
breakaways, David's commanding physique
casts fear into the eyes of arrogant
forwards seeking to enter the 18-yard
box. Though known for his colorful
use of metaphor on the field, David
enjoys spending time cooking and
entertaining family and friends.
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Christopher
'The Italian' Valmassoi
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Known
as "The Italian" in the
seedy underworld of Rochester, MI,
Christopher
is a well-respected forward who
is sure to make an impact. His trademark
"short shorts" keep defenders
guessing, as well as allow him an
extended
range of motion often resulting
in a plethora of goals. Known for
his
conservatism, Christopher doesn't
take kindly to change, so he'll
work to
maintain the status quo: winning.
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Brian Conway
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If
Brian Conway's game was a passport
it would have a multitude of stamps.
His play has been cast from the
barrios of Mexico, the beaches of
Brazil,
and the pristine pitches of England.
This talented Libra dedicates the
2008
season to the MLS scouts who follow
OYFC football and all the children
who
have his poster on the wall.
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Karl 'The Goldfish'
Lopata
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Karl
Lopata finds refuge from his food
dependence on the field. Thus, the
pitch is a sanctuary from the empty
calories that haunt him daily. His
love
of chicken fingers is matched only
by his love of scoring goals and
tackling. His ability to score goals
paired with a loud, grumbling stomach
is sure to keep defenders on their
toes.
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Nick Swantek
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1
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Kev Garner
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Obtained
for two million-quid on a transfer
deal, this versatile bulldog is
ready for action. As his accent
hinders the communication on the
pitch, Mr.
Garner lets his game do the "talking."
Known for his blistering shot and
daft tackles, this charming Brit
is ready to make her Majesty, the
Queen,
wish he had never left the Commonwealth.
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John 'J Mc'
McMullen
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The
backbone of the team relies heavily
on his military experience in motivating
teammates. This angry Irishman is
known for "McMullen-ing"
opposing forwards and even tackling
his own teammates if they have a
bad touch or if special situations
arise. John’s leadership with
OYFC and his future career in management
stem from his unparalleled success
for the Flying Donkey’s –
well renowned in Michigan soccer
lore for its multiple championships,
extensive player recruiting, and
two-footed assaults. Video highlights
of past Donkey achievements are
a fixture in the OYFC pregame as
well as a surprisingly useful date
night. Opponents cry at the site
of J-Mc, teammates aspire to have
a fraction of the success of J-Mc
and 4-Star Generals consult with
him on strategy as J-Mc is a winner,
no matter if he is on the battlefield
or the pitch.1
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Johnny Ginetti
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1
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Jamie Shooks
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His
flashy game matches his fashionable
clothes. That is, Shooks-ie is just
a flashy off the field as he is
on. Like James Bond, this dandy
is dressed
to the nines, yet packs a deadly
shot. Furthermore, Shooks prefers
defenders like Bond prefers a martini:
shaken, not stirred.
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Kenny Coppola
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Known
for his acceleration, Mr. Coppola
is as fast a mongoose, with the
reflexes of a cat. Defenders, though
rarely being able to see his feet
at
all, have noted his ability to score
with both his right and left. Also,
it is said that Mr. Coppola once
scored five goals in one game while
wearing
his "Timbalands." With
that said, Mr. Coppola has petitioned
FIFA to change
the on-field dress to accommodate
his bold style. With that ball at
his
feet, this striker has one thing
in mind: putting the ball through
the net.
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Joey 'The Agent'
Callahan
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This
silent but deadly midfielder is
known throughout the intelligence
community and aids his team in gathering
vital information about rival
teams. And rest assured, whatever
he says will be used against the
other
teams in a court of domination.
Known for creeping in and out of
the
shadows and slipping through the
cracks between defenders, this youngster
is
sure to make a difference.
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Theirry 'Frenchie'
Bersot
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1
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Jim Stachura
(Player/Coach)
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The
"father-figure" this team
so desperately needs is named Jimmy
Stachura.
His dedication, his intensity, his
prowess is exemplified by his oft
worn
baseball cap. His players understand
the power of the cap. When worn
backward, Mr. Stachura has two goals
in mind: keeping the sun of his
neck
and winning.
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Al Steaban
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1
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Christopher
Cooper
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This
multi-sport star is a newcomer to
the world of footie. However, with
the speed and grace of a gazelle
and the brute force of a bear, Cooper
is
able to strike fear into the hearts
of defenders and goaltenders alike.
Known off the pitch for his immaculate
beard and friendly demeanor, he
is
likely to garner just as much respect
in the discotheques as on the pitch.
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Mike Mattei
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Out
on bail, fresh out of jail, Michigan
dreamin...This reformed footballer
is a potent lefty. Earning his stripes
on the mean streets of northern
Oakland County, he learned to play
footy with a medicine ball before
stealing his first soccer ball at
age 6. After returning to the game
after
a 1-2 year lay-off and suddenly
finding that "good behavior"
really does
pay-off, this footballer is ready
to play.
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Joey Beshara
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1
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Brian Eichenlaub
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Steve Nelson
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Ben Nelson
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Pete Nelson
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